Are you pregnant? Have you been trying to figure out what to do?
Finding out you are pregnant can be a serious shock, especially when you are young. There are many things running through your mind and often you may want to make impulsive decisions. Try to slow down and think before you make decisions that impact the next 18+ years of your life. You have time to think. Here are some serious questions you and your mate should ask yourselves before you make your decision.
- Are you and your boyfriend/girlfriend currently together?
- Do you plan on getting married and/or staying together for the next 18+ years?
- Is the relationship healthy, productive, and non-abusive?
- If you two are not together and you decide to have or keep the baby, will you allow him/her to have an active role in the child’s life?
- Do you or your mate have a job? Do you have healthcare benefits and life insurance? How will you pay for prenatal care? If not, do you know of agencies that can help?
- Do you know where your medical facility is? Do you have a doctor?
- How much money do each of you make individually per week? How about collectively per month?
- Do you and your mate have any other children?
- Is the amount of money you two make together enough to support your family?
- Can you support your new baby financially without your mate?
- How many grandparents will the baby have in his/her life?
- Do the grandparents (your parents) currently have other infant children to raise?
- Do all the grandparents support your relationship with your mate?
- In case of an emergency are the grandparents willing to temporarily or permantantly support your child?
- Where do you currently reside? Is it a safe environment for your child?
- Where do the grandparents reside? Is that a safe environment for your child to be in?
- What is the medical history of you and your mate? Do either of you suffer from any disesases or mental illness?
- Do either of you currently do drugs, smoke, or drink alcohol? If so, are you willing to give it up?
- Do either of you currently participate in criminal activities? Do either of you have a criminal record?
- Is there anything in your life educationally, medically, or criminally that can affect the pregnancy or the overall health of the child?
- Are you and/or your mate religious? Do either of you believe in certain religious practices? Do you or both of you believe in God?
- Are you aware of what resources are available in your community to help you?
- Are you and your mate ready and willing to sacrifice whatever is necessary for the well being of the child? Are you willing to sacrifice hanging out, partying, doing drugs, smoking, travelling, fixing up your car, accepting a college scholarship, possibly going away to school, previous friendships, team memberships, gang memberships, getting your hair done, going out to the movies, long work hours, time, money, sleep, etc.? Are you and your mate willing to sacrifice life as you know it for the life of your baby?
- Are you prepared to ask yourself the tough questions truthfully and honestly? Are you prepared to answer any other questions your loved ones may throw at you?
- Do you have the capacity to love this baby more than you love yourself?
These 25 questions should lead to more questions. You should then be in a greater position to make an informed & educated decision. Sometimes the life and death of a human being is attached to this choice. Sometimes the life of a deserving couple is attached to this choice. But ultimately, it is always your choice. Please absorb and understand the gravity and seriousness of the situation. Examine and analyze all the angles, then consult a professional who can help you make the best choice for you and your mate.
Is something in your past adversely affecting your future plans? Have you been raped or molested? Do you have a criminal history?
Consider this: When we are children, we naturally depend on others to raise, help, teach, and support us. Sometimes people, family and friends, take advantage of our trust and dependence. They take advantage of our youthfulness, ignorance, and overall naivety. Tragically, this sometimes results in rape, molestation, and other forms of sexual assault. It can even result in a trusted adult teaching us how to steal cars, shop lift, sell drugs, break in houses, or prostitute ourselves. Please remember, it is not your fault. You cannot be held accountable for somebody else’s wicked, perverted, criminal mind. You can’t always control what others say and do to you, but you can control your response to what was done. The only thing holding you back is “you.” Acknowledge the hurt. Don’t pretend it didn’t happen. Recognize the pain, but don’t wallow in it. Don’t drown yourself in it. Don’t let it suffocate you; don’t let it swallow up your future. Do not be ashamed. Do not keep it a secret; do no allow yourself to be frozen in fear. Get up, get out, and seek the help of the authorities. Find a teacher, or a preacher. Find a police officer or a counselor and report your problem immediately. Don’t let this break you down. Don’t allow this secret to remain hidden in the dark. Expose it! Turn the light of the truth on it. Seek professional help… There’s a beautiful side to your situation, it’s the beauty of your “youth.” You can and you will make a full and complete recovery. Your mind, body, and soul are still blossoming and blooming. There’s so much of your being, so many dimensions of you that remain pristine, fresh, and new. The luxuries of life await you; money, homes, cars, travel, relationships, friendships, and romances. Adventures and breathtaking experiences are within your reach. Happiness is your birthright. You deserve a life of love, so choose to live it. Dream Big and Live Big…
One of the greatest advantages you have over many people is your youth. You are young and strong. Your organs and cells are incredibly resilient. Smoking and drinking alcohol, popping pills, sipping syrup, and shooting or snorting dope destroys your organs and cells. Getting high robs you of your youth. It takes away your advantage. You’re destroying your hair, nails, and teeth. You’re destroying your supple wrinkle free skin. Girls, you’re polluting your reproductive system. Boys, you’re destroying your sperm cells and sexual organs. Drugs destroy your brain cells, they poison your blood. Don’t waste the precious early years of your life experimenting with drugs. School isn’t the place to be high. School isn’t the place to be sluggish, dizzy, or numb. As a student or student athlete, you should stay away from any and all activities which could hurt or hinder your performance or progress in class. You should not do anything that could negatively affect your strength, stamina, and agility within your sport. School is to be used as a launching pad to educate and qualify you, to cultivate your talents, and intellectual gifts, and to launch you into the next stage of your life. During your journey through life, as you transition and grow from a teenager into an adult, you’ll experience natural highs. The elation of scoring a touchdown, or getting the lead in a school play. The euphoria of pitching a good game, the natural high of sinking a clutch free throw or being on a winning team. There are cheerleading competitions and science fairs, the thrill of achieving a high G.P.A. What about nailing a perfect landing in gymnastics or playing at your peak performance in band? What about singing at the perfect pitch or harmonizing at the right key during choir practice? These are natural highs, the good feeling and highs of success, advancement, and progress. That’s what prom and graduations are for, to celebrate your accomplishments. That powerful feeling of fulfillment is the reward for all your hard work. Ten years after graduating high school or college you’re in a position to live a life filled with abundance, health, wealth, harmony, and happiness. On the other hand, ten years after using drugs, you’re in a position of needing a new liver or kidney transplant. Maybe a child will have a birth defect, or you are paralyzed on one side of your face from a stroke. These are just things that can happen physically, there are many other things that can can happen as a result of drug and alcohol abuse. The choices you make right now shape and mold your future. The choices you have today could haunt you tomorrow.
Don’t be a sucker. Don’t allow the tobacco industry to make a profit off your addiction. Don’t allow the drug companies and low level dealers to profit off your misery and self destruction. Don’t allow the alcohol companies to profit from your foolishness. Don’t let designer drug pushers play you like a sucker. Forget about bath salts. Get good grades, get a job and make good money. Forget about weed. Get good grades, get a job, and make good money. Forget about heroin, alcohol, ecstasy. Save your money. Don’t spend it on poison. No drinking and driving, getting your license revoked or restricted. You don’t need that trouble in your life. You don’t need to flunk out of school. You don’t need school staff or police raiding your locker, or going through your backpack. You don’t need to lose your scholarship. You don’t need to vomit all over yourself, or worry about concealing track marks and scabs on your arms. You don’t need the nosebleeds and rotten teeth. Please remember you can’t get addicted to something you’ve never tried. Stay focused. Stay strong. Stay healthy. Go to school prepared to learn. Don’t complicate your life with drugs and alcohol. Enjoy your youth, don’t be in such a rush to grow old. Dream Big & Live Big…
If you feel you have lost control of yourself and you believe you have a substance abuse problem, please consult a substance abuse counselor immediately or contact us so we can hook you up to the appropriate people. It’s never too late to regain control of your life. You’re young, you can make a full recovery. You still have your whole life ahead of you.
Do you have any questions? We are sure you do! Feel free to ask us anything, nothing is too personal, too trivial, too out there. We welcome all questions and it will help us in helping others. If you want a private response you can go to the contact us section and it will be handled as such.